So, what do you want to do with your life?
I'm always very surprised to hear that people don't know what they want to do with their life or what job they want to have etc. I've always known and I can't even imagine the personality/mentality of someone who doesn't.
When I was 6 years old, I wanted to have three jobs. I wanted to be a teacher in the morning, a hair dresser in the afternoon and a flight attendant during the night. Talk about being ambitious! Later I wanted to be a teacher, because I was annoyed by the system which allows pupils and even students to learn everything by heart and then recite that at exam time and get a high grade, even when they don't actually understand anything. I wanted to change the system and only offer employment to teachers who really knew what they were talking about and who were capable of explaining that to students. Later on I realised that Slovenian schools are (too) full of pretentious, bored people (students and teachers alike) who only want to hear what they think they will need in life and nothing more. I knew that I don't want to force anybody to learn something they have no interest in. But as for myself, there's hardly something I don't want to do.
I want to write two books (but am too afraid to start writing, because I fear I have nothing to say), and many short stories, I want to learn to sing well (I used to sing in a choir, but left when I had to choose between that and ballet), keep dancing ballet, occasionally do pilates and keep jogging three times a week.
I want to learn French, Swedish, Russian, Arabic and Ancient Greek or Latin. I want to read more books, more novels, educate myself further on ballet history, famous dancers and composers. I feel it would be wise to deepen my knowledge of art, film, painting, history and musical theory. I want to go to more galleries, museums and see more cities and see many more films. In the more distant future I want to travel to Asia and America.
I'm quite seriously considering studying something else when I'm done with medicine, as well. I want to be the best doctor (Ph.D., head of department, a leading scientist in my field and an author of several books and articles - all inclusive) I can be and want (if I ever come to that) to have 3 children. However, if I break up with boyfriend and decide not to have my own family, I'll most probably work for Doctors Without Borders and move abroad, quite possibly to England. There's almost no modesty to my goals and dreams. So I do have problems, when I talk to a woman my age and she says she doesn't yet know what she wants to do in her life. Whereas my only problem is when to find the time to do all of that!
On a later occasion I was talking to a girl, who is 15 and she denied knowing what job she wanted to have. When I persevered, she finally admitted that she wanted to be a detective, but quickly added that she'll probably never make it. She's very shy and insecure and very rarely thinks herself capable of anything. But I doubt all people are that shy.
So why is it that some people just don't have a clue? How is it possible to live without any goals or desires?
Labels: life
9 Comments:
Hey! I've lived 26 years without having a clue what to do with my life and I'm still alive :)
I remember never knowing what to do. In kindergarten we had to draw us as adults with a job we wanted to do and I didn't know what to draw... I chose my study only about 2 days before having to turn in the application.
I admit it's quite frustrating - when people ask, what do you want to do, or, what will you do, what are your plans, and I just don't know what to tell them.
But me personally, I quite enjoy it. To me it's fulfilling to take life as it comes. I do have certain plans, like, finding my own place to live, maybe trying another study or a MSc, have another dog ;) but then again, if things change, so what, life is so interesting that I prefer taking what it gives me instead of working hard to achieve something. It also happened a couple of times, when I worked like crazy to get something, and then I did, first of all it disappointed me, because I felt I worked too much for something that was not worth so much, and second, I neglected everything else in my life just to achieve that.
It's not that I don't have desires, it's just that I'm not so fixed on them. Plus, I constantly change my mind about what I want and I quickly get fed up with things. I just enjoy living like this, it's interesting and challenging, because you never know what comes next.
I guess we're all just different :)
Maybe you can look at it like this - if life is a forest, you prefer searching for that perfect tree, while I prefer looking at the forest as a whole and to see all trees.
Or something ;)
Oh, sorry for the triple comment - but you seem to have struck a chord in me with this topic :)
It's not that nothing interests me, everything interests me! But nothing really specifically :)
I also learned (through ups and downs) that the best way I function is if I can find and keep the perfect balance between being active towards life and being passive. I have lots of problems with that balance, because most of the time I seem to be either to passive or too active (trying to change what simply cannot be changed or not trying to change what could easily be done). But my life works best for me when the balance is right.
ps. I've been learning latin in high school. I also seriously considered studying it - but now I'm grateful I did not :)
We are different, that's for sure. I don't go with the flow, because I don't like everything or anything that flow might bring and I'm not above working hard to get something. Working hard doesn't bother me. In fact I prefer to have too little time to do everything than to have nothing to do.
Well, neither I don't like everything that the flow brings. But then, I don't settle for just anything that it brings, either... I just think there are much more options in life than I can see or know to decide right away which one is the best...
It should probably say, "neither I like everything...".
The problem I have with "going with the flow" is that sometimes nothing comes up for weeks at a time (or I'm just not interested in it). And I like action, I want things to be happening. And I'm just obsessed with the idea of making your dreams come true. I firmly believe in working hard to achieve your goals and desires. This is a fixture in my view of life.
I think that very rarely something happens all by itself and when it does, you should embrace it. But most of the time, I feel I have to work to get something I want the way I want it.
I don't think your view of the matter is better or worse, it's just different. :)
I totally agree :) and I also think it's important that you choose the way of living that suits you best.
As for nothing happening for weeks - it's never like that. There are always thousands of opportunities. It's just a matter of deciding whether and what to choose. And besides, sometimes you have to rest, too :)
So in conclusion, one way or another, life still depends mostly on you, on what you do with it...
I do agree 100 percent with your last sentence. In Dumbledore's words: It is our choices Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
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